AN End

How at times our life comes to a halt...Just when we think God has set everything right and nothing is ever going to go wrong from now on, it all turns. It turns and topples you over, it sweeps you of the ground leaving you hanging in the air and drops you in a place which takes all your might to come out from. Yes! This is what life is. It cant always be a bed of roses. But it never was. There was always a balance in life for me. Then why? Why should everything change so suddenly. It took all my heart to leave my house and move in here with GM to look after her. To leave my comfort zone, a set of lovely supportive friends, parents and everything and come here just with little hope that atleast my guy is here from time to time. And just when I've finally built a lovely oyester for myself to live in here, it has to all reverse and take me back to where there were also harsh memories.
Its so not fair. Its not fair to make my father so ill. A man who has always been a pillar of strength for our family, who will not fill his stomach but give us lavish food, who will not wear new clothes on his birthday but buy us for his birthday. Is it fair? Why should he go through so much trouble?
I'm torn between bombay and Hyd. I had committed to stay here facing end number of problems if any just so that i can look after Goolu. N now i have to leave the poor 87 year old completely dependent lady to God and go and be with my father who needs me equally. How can such a big illness come without any symptoms? How can just 90% of his kidneys completely fail? Without any symptoms without anything?
X is not here. How can i handle all of this alone? Everyone says be strong. But for how long. How long can a person have courage and how much courage can one summon up? Just how much courage.