Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Recession

Now...m not the type who talks about economics and the world politics n stuff on my blog...But lately, the recession has been hitting me and hitting me really hard...leaving hardly any place to be free of pressure, free of pain. I know I shouldn't be grumbling, m sorry God, I know there are a lot of troubles all over the world. But I'm not grumbling to you. Not even asking you to help me, coz there are many more people out there who need you help much more than I do.

These are just a few thoughts I want to pen down so I can set myself free of the burden of sharing it with someone. I wish things were better really. I mean I am happy with Xerxes being away from me and me waiting for the wedding, at least I know we will be together. But what about my job?

How is that going to go? I mean I have been hunting more than a dozen places now. My boss says try hard, but how much herder. My father keeps saying there's no money...Fuck it man, so what if we dont have so much money for the wedding. I'm sure we do.We have just enough which allows us to spend widely. M just sick of everyone talkin about money. I mean no one realizes the pressure one goes through man. How much fucking more can I try...try, try, try and just try...

Xerx is not in town now; and wont be there for really long too...All our friends had a get together, they forgot me. Very convenient! A nice way of making a person feel cared for. That's what they all told Xerxes...We are there for her. Dont worry..
Hmmmph..I feel so terrible today..Not even self pity, rather feel like no one needs me man. Everyone forgets who's Tina? Who is she? Xerxes' girl friend/fiancee, This one's daughter, that one's grand daughter, the other one's daughter in law... But who is she? what am I? A LITTLE DOLL WHO HAS NO FREAKING IDENTITY...We are all tagged...We are so and so company's employee..We belong to this city or state, so we become a north Indian south Indian, hindu, muslim, christian, parsi etc...But who are we at the end of the day? 

I am Tina...I have certain qualities why people should know who I am...

Now here I was writing my heart out and I get the most beautiful prayer from one of my dearest friend where he says and I quote "Dear toni.. I just offered a long prayer to mother mary to make all your woes and worries.  She is with u. :) offer a prayer when u see this and be strong.. :)"
Now this is the power of prayer and blessings...
Thank u god...M glad this didn't end in a sad way. Thanx Sri...

2 comments:

~PakKaramu~ said...

Visiting your blog

svee said...

thanks tones... im glad I helped :)